"Dear ESPN, I heard you were moving SportsCenter West. You should really promo that more. Perhaps even during every commercial break."—signed, "The First Two Rounds of the Masters on ESPN" promo
Yikes.
So, ESPN is finally landing on the West Coast, and finally unveiling their huge production monstrosity in LA.
Hold up, four-letter: Do you mean to tell me that LA is "somehow" more attractive than Bristol, Conn.? Promote the genius who discovered that (unless it’s Mike Greenberg).
It's about time ESPN made it past the Mississippi. For years my friends and I have said, during every college football season, that it would be nice for ESPN to show their East Coast media bias live, in person, instead of from insulated, remote Connecticut.
And I, as a sports fan, realize this makes total sense. Why shouldn’t the biggest male brand have a presence, a toehold, in the nation's No. 2 media market? After all, if LA doesn’t have football, it should at least have former football players talking about the NFL.
Here are five great reasons Eddie Shore is jazzed about this move.
More Bodies for NFL Countdown
I can’t tell you how many Sunday mornings I’ve watched Chris "so many dumb music reference nicknames I can’t remember" Berman, and thought, "Hey, these guys need to expand the set." Now they have "another" set.
Maybe they should add another hour. Who doesn’t like pre-game for week four staring at 5:00 am?
The ESPY's Just Got Better
Who hasn’t thought about cancer, terrorism, or the economy and thought: "We need more award shows?"
Now with ESPN having it’s own facilities in LA, we can have even more hype, perhaps a longer show, and give athletes something they almost never get: unwarranted love and adulation.
Hot Girls
Nothing against Erin Andrews, but she was getting long in the "hot sideline reporter" tooth about a year ago. Hmmm, which city in the country has the highest concentration of starfuckers*, desperate to do anything to get their break in front of the camera?
ESPN’s just jumped up a level in intern/PA/throwaway sideline reporter eye candy. That’s never a bad thing.
(*Stuart Scott, it’s a term. It does NOT mean you are a star. Back in the shallow end, bro.)
Better Commercials
Hands down, ESPN has the best commercials going. (Not a Kenny Mayne fan, but that commercial with Steve Smith is fantastic.) Think about the possibilities open for ESPN commercials now, moving to the mecca of US production.
Prediction: "I can’t work with this guy," says Scott Van Pelt.
Spielberg: "Sorry, Scott, my bad. I’ll work on your motivation."
More Production Facilities=More Channels
ESPN, the Deuce, ESPNU, ESPN News, ESPN Classic, ESPN Desportes, and ESPN Radio. Yeah, all great. But what about the guy who has six TVs and two radios, and never sleeps?
I will not be satisfied until ESPN has branded each vertical with 24-hour coverage. Yes, Eddie Shore wants to see ESPN Darts. ESPN Kayaking. I like to fish.
But ESPN (regular) only gives me 20 hours of it a week. What? No one fishes, talks about fishing, breaks down fishing, drafts lures, and preps for the bassmasters on the off days?
With another studio, it's time to add about 18 more channels, ESPN. And they don’t all have to be high def...it’s not the worst thing to not see John Clayton in 1080p.
Thank you, ESPN. Ping me when you get ESPN Bollywood. Cricket is the 14th fastest growing sport among 17 to 19-year-old Pakistanis.
Oh yeah, before I forget: Happy Friday.
For more Eddie Shore, check out http://www.dailyballbreakers.com/ (real guys holding sports accountable), or if you hate the WNBA, try www.dbbsports.com <http://www.dbbsports.com> . <!--EndFragment-->
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