Alex Rodriguez

David Ortiz’ recent profanity-laced tantrum with the Boston media isn’t his first meltdown, and if he continues to hit poorly, Big Papi’s spoiled inner child will certainly rear his ugly head once again.

Yet Papi isn’t the only head case roaming the diamonds of America’s pastime. As you read this, half-whacked megastars and journeymen alike are getting ready to take the field all over today’s MLB slate.

They are all so different.

Trading in fantasy sports can be simplified to a four-word common denominator: Sell high, buy low.

The key is knowing which players will bounce back from a slow start and which ones will crash and burn after lighting the fantasy world on fire early on.

It should be noted that at the moment, not even a full week into the MLB's regular season, you won't find too many owners panicking enough about Mark Teixeira's slow start or overzealous about Vernon Wells' astronomical stats thus far.

Working in a local supermarket, I have a front row seat for all the latest hollywood gossip and glamour. There are upsides and downsides to this.

For example: downside, I can name about twenty celebrities who have cellulite, and how many plastic surgeries Heidi Montag has had.

A clear upside: the Swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated, or any magazine that has Kim Kardashian on the cover.

I know I mentioned it yesterday, but it's really worth repeating: We're less than a week away from Opening Day of the Major League Baseball season. Wow!

But with first pitch just days away, there is still a lot of preparation to be done, and I'm not talking about your favorite team deciding on their fifth starter. Nope, I'm talking about you making the final tweaks to your fantasy team.

Listed below, are the points and counterpoints about if we should be as outraged about amphetamines as steroids:

Point: Yes, amphetamines are cheating just like steroids.

Counterpoint: No, steroids enhance performance while amphetamines enable performance. One makes you better while the other gets you on the field to play baseball.

P: Amphetamines do more than just get you on the field.

At first glance, it looks like baseball and competitive balance run on parallel lines. There are the Yankees with their 27 World Championships and the Pittsburgh Pirates who have not had a winning season since 1992.

Those two franchises met in the epic 1960 World Series when Bill Mazeroski won it with a Game Seven ninth-inning home run. 1960 was during a run where the Yankees played in 14 out of 16 World Series.

Major League Baseball has a rich history of nicknames, but not all nicknames are created equally. The league is currently flooded with lazy, uninspired nicknames that are, more accurately, abbreviations that hold no real meaning.

Some, for instance A-Rod (Alex Rodriguez) and Arm-Ram (Aramis Ramirez) are better left without meaning. Both monikers are better suited to something you would find in the adult section of the video store. Other nicknames are stretches or just sound ridiculous. Jimmy "J-Roll" Rollins comes to mind.

Next time Torii Hunter not only should have a better choice of words, but also get his facts right.

The Angel outfielder should know that the latest sensation to come from Latin America, Cuban left-hander Aroldis Chapman, was signed to a six-year, $30 million deal by the Cincinnati Reds.

With steroid testing now implemented all around Major League Baseball and an era known best as "The Steroid Era" coming to a close it's just about time we got to ranking the players who juiced during the in the era.