Humor

After he made it home and got into bed, Miguel Cabrera was swarmed by teammates who gathered around the sleeping slugger to congratulate him on the no hitter he had just completed on a very trying Date Night.

It was yet another no hitter in this year that has seen four of them already, not including Armando Galarraga's near perfect-game.

But this one might have been the most impressive as Cabrera, with a history of alcohol and domestic violence problems, came through completely unscathed for the first time in his career.

A shipment of corkboard arrived at Fenway Park today, with a note from New York Yankees GM Brian Cashman.

Omar Minaya made a pretty good move by finding this random baseball player with an odd name and a knuckleball. The pitcher's name is R.A. Dickey and he has started off the season 6-0 with the Mets. He has been around the block for a while, but this season many feel like this guy came from nowhere. 

Nobody knows his true identity. 

Last year, he went 1-1 with the Twins in 35 games. This season's wins are equivalent to the amount has with Seattle and Minnesota the last two years. But Baseball Reference and all other websites have all of his stats wrong.

As seasons and almost more importantly aimless offseasons pass by, we Royals fans have had to adjust our expectations for contention, with the carrot on the proverbial stick predictably staying two years away. Not so long ago, we were looking to 2010 as the year that .500 would be attainable—the year that respectability would be ours.

For many years Angels fans felt like the red-headed stepchild of Southern California baseball.

However, times have changed and it’s the Halos time to shine.

While the Dodgers still do well at the box office and on the field, they just aren’t the same franchise they used to be. The years of tradition they had were flushed down the toilet by FOX and Frank McCourt. I give you many reasons why there is room on the Angels bandwagon if you want to get off the sinking ship that is Dodgers baseball.

Washington Nationals phenom pitcher Stephen Strasburg can add another title to his young and blossoming career, Hall of Famer. Despite his career just getting started, Strasburg has been announced as a surprise additional inductee into the Baseball Hall of Fame.

On the final weekend of July, the rookie pitcher will join outfielder Andre Dawson, umpire Doug Harvey, and manager Whitey Herzog as the newest class of the Hall of Fame.

Who else would be allowed into Yankee Stadium or Citi Field in that outfit?

That's a rhetorical question, so no need to answer it.

Who else could manage to sneak past security and talk to players inside the clubhouse after a loss?

Maybe only a handful of celebrities come to mind.

Who else could make New Yorkers suddenly consider the middle finger to be an obscene gesture after years of it?

Only a pop singer that talks about monsters.

Yesterday, my son wanted to go to the Dairy Queen. Since I’m trying to eat healthy, I inquired about the selections they had that didn’t resemble candy.

The girl offered me a chocolate covered banana.

I said, “That’s it? Don't you have a more phallic desert?”

Obviously not. So when she handed the treat my way, one thing crossed my mind:

On Wednesday, June 16, Jesus Christ rose again!

Christ's 1,977-year absence has been laid to rest.

He was spotted rising in Pittsburgh, in the form of baseball player Pedro Alvarez. 

Christ's disguise may have fooled many, but not Pittsburgh Pirate fans—a strong and devout group of Catholics.

When Christ came to his first at bat, he received a standing ovation from the fans that decided to come watch the Pirates lose their 10th consecutive game.

These athletes may be dominating their respective sports, but if they were actors they likely couldn't get a call-back for Freddie got Fingered.

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