Humor

It was a different world back in 1987.

No one had a cell phone. The Internet had not been invented. GM wasn’t broke. Barry Bonds had a normal-sized head.

And that’s when I learned to hate baseball mascots.

This morning I chased a rogue eyebrow hair for 46 tries. Then I opened the patio door and threw my cheap tweezers as far into the woods as I could. Now I know why people pay $10 for a pair of tweezers. Nothing is more frustrating than something getting the best of you.

Ask little Davey Herndon.

Some say baseball can be defined by just statistics, but only a true fan can see past the statistics and see the beauty of the game.  Some people say that a cycle is just four hits, that a perfect game is just another win, a walk off home run is just a hit, that a no hitter is just another win! In the next few weeks I will dive into baseball lore, legend, databases, Wikipedia articles, and my baseball filled brain to try and let you see the beauty of baseball I see every time I see that gorgeous green diamond.

Originally posted on Midwestropolitan .

Last year I got into a debate with a couple of guys from work.  The night before, I had just watched the end of a Cubs game and witnessed one of the lamest things I had ever seen/heard.

The Cubbies had just pulled off a victory and I started to hear 1970s folk music playing.  I literally thought there was an audio problem with the broadcast.  I realized pretty quickly that it wasn't a mistake, and the annoying sound was coming from Wrigley Field.

In a surprise twist in the never-ending saga of Carlos Zambrano, the Cubs management has decided to send the eight-year veteran starter to the bullpen to make way for the 12-year-old Henry Rowengartner, who just came off the disabled list with a broken arm.

Rowengartner, or Rosenbagger/Gardenhoser as he likes to be called, played some outfield for the Pirates of the Little League, but has confidence he can make the switch to pitcher as new teammate Randy Wells has.

Just when things were starting to look up for Jose Reyes on the field, a new scandal off the field could put the young shortstop's season in jeopardy. This morning Jose was questioned by the feds in regards to his "Professor Reyes Spanish Academy."

It shouldn't surprise anyone that Clevelanders love to complain.

We certainly have just cause: with rampant unemployment and poverty, miserable weather, and heartbreaking sports teams, Forbes recently named us the most miserable city in America.

But as I listened to the increasingly drunk fans sitting behind me at Progressive Field the other night (they were pretty loud, it was kind of hard not to), I realized that some of their beefs really didn't hold water.

Some of their complaints were about things that were preventable, others were hypocritical, and the rest were simply stupid.

Here's

Yes, it was wonderful to see Houston get within one game of being halfway to .500. They're 4-9 courtesy of a 7-5 win over the soon-to-be Miami Marlins (I'd call them the Florida Marlins, but I'm worried that noted Tampa Bay Rays fan Terry "Hulk Hogan" Bollea might send me an angry message, BROTHER!).

What I’m Reading

• Id’ like to give the Brewers some words of advice, but the sign says it all: “Sign Prince and they will come” .