Humor

Here is a short list of what I have deemed to be the best names in baseball. The important thing to remember is that mothers and fathers actually sat down and decided to name their kids these names. These names will definitely not be featured in any baby book. OK, so not all of these names are that bad, but some of them are just downright funny.
Feel free to leave any others that you know in the comment box.

It's a tough economy out there. We all know that by now.

To everyone who resisted the desire to touch the clicker late in the impending shutout in Friday night's Phillies game with the Marlins, I commend you.

I have but one thing to say: That’s why we call him Shane Victorino!

Did you see that?! His grand slam was sweet!

So maybe it wasn't as immortal as the one he slammed when we crushed C.C. (wait, he prefers "CC'; I'm rolling my eyes here) Sabathia in the Playoffs, but it hit the spot, no doubt.

I thought it was cool when I was a prepubescent boy curious about all things sex.

I thought it was cool when I was in college, watching the game with my buddies.

I even thought it was cool as a single guy in my early 20's.

Now I have a little girl that is counting on me to show her the way, and not only is it no longer cool, it is no longer tolerable.

Sports programming was always geared toward kids and was considered family programming when I was growing up. Watching the game with your Mom or Dad as a little tyke was an American rite of passage.

With 396 home runs under his belt, Oakland’s Jason Giambi sits four home runs away from 400 for his career. Sure, it doesn’t carry with it the same mystique that Gary Sheffield’s recent accomplishment does, but still…it’s impressive.

Like fingernails to a chalk board...

Like the slip of your knife while slicing lemons...

Like the explosive burst of a midsummer's moth on your newly waxed windshield...

Chewing foil...a thorn in your sock...sand in your eye...a dead battery...that one driver who cannot figure out what to do when the light turns green...

Josh Beckett is all of this to me.  All of this.

And so much more.

Yankees-Red Sox begins again tonight at fenway. I hold no opinionsfor its outcome. No predictions. No forecasts. 

I hold my breath.

Rumor has it that Orioles owner Peter Angelos has an insane man crush on outfielder Nick Markakis. So much so that he would have mortgaged the farm, so to speak, to get him in the 2003 Major League draft. Nick the Stick can do that to a guy, whether he's an 80 something attorney or a 20 something retail superfan. His list of skills and intangibles is off the chart: hitting power and acumen, plate discipline, excellent fielding ability, speed and baseball knowledge. Here's why you should be a believer too.

The English language is one of the most difficult to learn and master, it confuses many people to their dying day. But one would think that someone would use some form of spell check on major league teams jerseys before they trot them out in front of a huge crowd everyday. This list is a tribute to the best typos in pro sports. These are not in a Top 10 format, just a list of epic fails.

With special thanks to ESPN's Paul Lukas for the idea and several of the photos.

...And now we return to our regularly scheduled broadcast. Yes, welcome back to part two of my two-part introspective look at Cole Hamels. So continuing our discussion on Cole Hamels, let me first start off by thanking the fine people at Cole Hamels Facts [dot] com.

My friend Moorphrang is from Nepal and he recently visited me. In order to introduce him to some true American culture, I decided to take him to see an afternoon game at Yankee Stadium.

We decided to see the Cleveland Indians against the Yankees on Saturday afternoon last. I checked online and realized that even at the last minute I could still get four tickets for seats three rows from the field just a little to the third base side of home plate.